Personal Horror Stories and Alarming Research Findings About the Mental Health of LGBTQ+ Young People in the U.S.

My transgender friend's experiences and a recent national survey reveal how bad LGBTQ+ young people's mental health is and why

Photo by Isi Parente on Unsplash

A close friend who is transgender called me in tears. She reassured me that she was safely home, then said she had been physically assaulted at the grocery store. Her attacker had called her a “fucking faggot” as he beat her and made her bleed; thankfully another shopper had intervened and prevented more severe injuries.

Then she had to endure police questions like, “Did you hit on him?” She had not, of course, but the police were convinced she must have done something to provoke her attacker. They didn’t believe her until the store manager showed them security camera footage that proved the assault was unprovoked.

When I asked her if I could share her experience in this post, she agreed and wanted to share others. She has welcomed a total of 21 LGBTQ+ youth (all adults now) into her home over the years after their parents kicked them out of theirs. She calls them her children (and their kids her grandchildren), and they consider her their mom. Sadly, six of those 21 are now dead. They chose to end their lives instead of continuing to experience verbal and physical attacks like my friend has.

Another two now have LGBTQ+ teenagers. Their teens are bullied at school and told things like, “Trump will fix this.” If they report it, the bully’s parents and teachers claim the bully is a great kid who would never do that.

Stories like theirs are all too common, according to this 2024 U.S. National Survey on the Mental Health of LGBTQ+ Young People. Of the more than 18,000 LGBTQ+ young people (ages 13-24) surveyed, 12 percent had attempted suicide in the last year and 39 percent had seriously considered it.

Let that sink in for a moment. More than one in ten had attempted suicide and nearly four in ten had seriously considered it within the last year. And 90 percent of the LGBTQ+ young people surveyed said their well-being was negatively impacted by recent politics.

Some laws have obvious negative impacts. It’s easy to see how prohibiting doctors from prescribing gender-affirming hormones or puberty blockers to transgender youth negatively affects the well-being of those youth. It seems equally clear that the well-being of the estimated 15 percent of LGBTQ youth (ages 13-17) who live in states that explicitly censor discussions of LGBTQ people or issues throughout all school curricula is negatively impacted by that censorship.

But the cruel and false statements politicians make to justify laws like those may be even more harmful. Their statements are applauded and repeated by people who believe them (or benefit from pretending to). They make it easier for individuals and hate groups to harass and condemn LGBTQ+ youth.

And those actions have serious consequences. 23 percent of the LGBTQ+ young people surveyed said they had been physically threatened or harmed within the last year because of their sexual orientation or gender identity.

Those who had experienced bullying (49 percent of LGBTQ+ youth aged 13 - 17) had significantly higher rates of suicide attempts than those who had not been bullied. Young people who said they lived in “very unaccepting” communities had attempted suicide rates that were more than double those of young people whose communities were “very accepting.”

Another sad reality is that 84 percent of all LGBTQ+ young people surveyed said they wanted mental health care, but 50 percent of them didn’t get that care. Among the top ten reasons cited were these three:

• I didn’t want to have to get a parent’s permission (37%)

• I was afraid of being outed (24%)

• I have had a previous negative experience and didn’t want another one (20%)

Personal stories and survey findings like these should deeply concern all of us. They should compel us to counter false claims with facts and condemnations with love. Most of all, they should ignite or increase our desire to create and support safe, truly inclusive communities.

Here are three of the top ten ways LGBTQ+ youth and young adults said people in their lives can best show their support and acceptance:

• Trusting that I know who I am

• Standing up for me

• Not supporting politicians who advocate for anti-LGBTQ+ legislation

Others included “respecting my pronouns,” “accepting my partner,” and “displaying pride flags.”

May is “Mental Health Awareness Month,” so now is a great time to learn more about what we can do to help improve the mental health of LGBTQ+ youth. And the best way to do that is to ask an LGBTQ+ young person.

Another way is to consult the resources on the website of The Trevor Project. It’s the largest suicide prevention and crisis intervention nonprofit organization for LGBTQ+ young people and offers 24/7 support and information.

It’s time to acknowledge the elephant in the room and do something about it. The well-being of countless LGBTQ+ young people - and ourselves and everyone else - is at stake. We can’t afford to deny the seriousness or urgency of this mental health crisis any longer.