There’s a lot of emphasis on the importance of good role models for children. Parents are regularly urged to think about what kind of example they are setting, as are other adults who play significant roles in the lives of children.
Not as much attention is paid to the importance of role models for adults. There is some discussion of mentors that can help teach career skills, but that’s about it.
I think we need other kinds of people we can look up to and learn from. I’ve certainly benefitted from wise counsel provided by adults who are older than me and/or have previously experienced a challenging time similar to one that I’m facing.
12-step programs encourage new members to find a sponsor who has worked through the steps and participated in meetings for that reason. They understand the importance of learning from and being able to confide in someone who has been where you are. That person is recovering, and can share their wisdom and strength to give you hope that you, too, can survive and ultimately thrive.
One of my goals as a writer, particularly when I write about mental health, is to be that kind of support person for others. There are definitely days (and weeks, months, and years) when I question whether I have any strength or wisdom to offer. I sometimes fail miserably at practicing what I preach and don’t see how I could possibly have valuable insights to share when my own life is such a mess.
Nevertheless, I persist. When I reach out to other people in person or online I know that, if nothing else, I help them feel less alone. If the coping strategies that have helped me also help them, it’s an added bonus.
You can do the same. We all have life experiences that we have learned from and ways we can encourage others by sharing our stories.
I also have role models I’ve never met, including some who died before I was born. I imagine you do, too. Some people, like Gandhi, Susan B. Anthony, Rosa Parks, and Martin Luther King, Jr., leave lasting legacies because their words and actions dramatically improve the lives of many others.
Others inspire us because they demonstrate that age doesn’t have to limit what a person is capable of. Bruce Springsteen continues to be a role model for me partly because at age 73 he is on a world tour with the legendary E Street Band (most of whom are also in their 70s). I recently went to one of his concerts, and for nearly three hours Bruce sang and danced his way through 28 songs (almost all of which he also wrote). He and the band have more energy, stamina, and enthusiasm than musicians who are less than half their age!
At the other end of the age spectrum, Malala Yousafzai began speaking out against the Taliban when she was 11 years old. Later, after she recovered from being shot in the head by a Taliban member, she started a charity to advocate for girls’ education. She became the youngest Nobel Peace Prize winner in 2014, at age 17.
So I have two questions for you to ponder this week:
Who are your role models and why?
Who have you been or could you be a role model for and how?
I’d love to hear your answers in the comments. I’m especially curious about who your role models are, whether they are famous people or unsung heroes the rest of us have probably never heard of.
My sister Pris is one of my role models. Although she is really smart and talented, she worked an unassuming job in an office in a large corporation, and she saved her money and funded her retirement well.
She's always there for our family, helping my parents transition to a nursing home, and taking my mom to concerts and flower shows, etc., many times. She handled much of their funeral and other arrangements. She helped my older brother transition from his home to a hospital to a nursing home, and handled all of his affairs from there on out (and he wasn't nice about it at all). She is currently handling all my other brother's affairs, as he's not able to.
She's always there for me when I need support. And she recently offered her finished basement to a refugee family from Ethiopia.
Her selfless service to our family and to those less fortunate has been remarkable. She takes it all in stride—all of the messiness, endless phone calls, and complicated arrangements. She's such an inspiration.
I love your role models. As a kid, I looked up to Martin Luther King Jr and Gandhi as well. Now I love Oprah, Sahara Rose, and Raquelle Mantra (the last three are spiritual podcasters and teachers) because they model to me how they overcame their fears and followed their dreams. I also have peers that are similarly doing the same :)