I can relate to finding it hard to love myself at times. I was raised strictly with at times not much warmth from my father. His father had been hard on him. Since I was the oldest, I was expected to help with the younger siblings. I see a therapist too. She has me repeat affirmations to myself several times a day several times a day. For example breathing in the affirmation "I am lovable." I have found also that self hugs really so work. Although I have not done them for 30 minutes at a time, so I will try that. Lately, to counteract my old habit of thinking and worrying about others before thinking of myself, I am saying to myself, What do YOU need for yourself today.
Glad to hear that you are asking yourself what you need, and that self hugs have also worked for you. Yes, affirmations are great, too, although overly positive ones I don’t think are always true, like “If you believe it, you can achieve it,” don’t work for me.
I was recommended to try out self-hugs for 30 min per day.
Have you ever tried?
At the beginning, I almost felt disgusted. And ridiculous.
But, as the time (and days) passed, the heart started to react differently.
Something started to move, to unlock.
To the point that breathing patterns change. That I felt occasional warmth.
I guess that was love, that starts to spread.
You might want to give it a try, if you haven't.
Makes me feel less needy, and approach others as a result of a positive tension, and not just to fill up my own void.
That is an excellent suggestion, Lucio, and one I had not heard of before. I will have to give it a try. Thanks for sharing that!
I can relate to finding it hard to love myself at times. I was raised strictly with at times not much warmth from my father. His father had been hard on him. Since I was the oldest, I was expected to help with the younger siblings. I see a therapist too. She has me repeat affirmations to myself several times a day several times a day. For example breathing in the affirmation "I am lovable." I have found also that self hugs really so work. Although I have not done them for 30 minutes at a time, so I will try that. Lately, to counteract my old habit of thinking and worrying about others before thinking of myself, I am saying to myself, What do YOU need for yourself today.
Glad to hear that you are asking yourself what you need, and that self hugs have also worked for you. Yes, affirmations are great, too, although overly positive ones I don’t think are always true, like “If you believe it, you can achieve it,” don’t work for me.