Thank you for writing this essay and for sharing it with such clarity and care.
You speak from where you’ve been, and that gives each sentence a grounded kind of weight. I’ve been there, too. Twice. And again about five years ago, when I could barely choose what to wear for work each morning. Everything felt heavy and unreachable. It was like moving through fog with no sense of direction, just the pressure of needing to keep moving.
What you wrote about people meaning well and saying “you have it good” landed hard. I’ve heard that, too. It didn’t help. It made it harder to speak. I also hadn’t fully taken in what your reader described—that sudden lift in mood being a sign. I didn’t know. I’m grateful to know now.
You’re offering more than personal story. You’re offering what helped and what didn’t. You name real resources—988, NAMI—and you also name how recovery works. Not a finish line. Not something you cross and never visit again. That understanding makes space for the whole of a person. For the days that feel manageable and the ones that don’t.
You wrote this clearly, steadily, without turning away. You didn’t package anything up. You stayed with it. And that matters. I see what you’ve carried. I see what you’ve offered. Thank you for writing. Thank you for staying.
A reader gave me permission to share their response anonymously:
I’m a suicide survivor.
It’s really important that loved-ones know that when somebody whom they suspect might be contemplating suicide is very suddenly remarkably better and brighter and relieved and excited, that is a huge red flag. In my own case this was how I felt and behaved when I made what I thought at the time was the best decision of my life - which was to end it, and in so doing remove myself and my family from agony and difficulty. Once I’d made that decision I couldn’t believe how much better, how hopeful, how euphoric I felt - everything felt perfect. And then I did 'what I did' that same day.
I was lucky. I survived, but recovery has been an incredibly long process.
Thanks, Laura. I have also found tapping to be very helpful and highly recommend this site https://www.thetappingsolution.com/ for those who want to learn more. It presents research showing how effective tapping is at relieving anxiety (among other things), demonstrates how to tap, and has a free app I use daily.
I chose to upgrade to the paid version because it has hundreds of tapping options on a wide range of issues, daily inspirational quotes and short audio messages, and much more.
I really appreciate you putting the 988 crisis number out to the public. Also, by you- yourself talking about your experiences of having suicidal thoughts, and obtaining a therapist, you have helped people understand that they too can reach out for help. And you very clearly said to people whom are having suicidal thoughts-Reach out sooner for help from 988, and/or a good therapist, rather than reach out later. later. I do completely understand that there is no miracle pill for suicidal thoughts, and no quick fix with a therapist for these painful feelings. I have found Tapping to help with anxiety, and depression in my own life..There are very painful experiences in life and people need support to make difficult changes.
Beautifully written, heartfelt. Offers great insights and things to consider as we grapple with this topic and people we care about.
I hope ypu find my contribution helpful as well. It takes a village to make a difference with this massive issue. So glad to be connected.
Yes, it does take a village and I’m glad to be connected, also.
Wendi,
Thank you for writing this essay and for sharing it with such clarity and care.
You speak from where you’ve been, and that gives each sentence a grounded kind of weight. I’ve been there, too. Twice. And again about five years ago, when I could barely choose what to wear for work each morning. Everything felt heavy and unreachable. It was like moving through fog with no sense of direction, just the pressure of needing to keep moving.
What you wrote about people meaning well and saying “you have it good” landed hard. I’ve heard that, too. It didn’t help. It made it harder to speak. I also hadn’t fully taken in what your reader described—that sudden lift in mood being a sign. I didn’t know. I’m grateful to know now.
You’re offering more than personal story. You’re offering what helped and what didn’t. You name real resources—988, NAMI—and you also name how recovery works. Not a finish line. Not something you cross and never visit again. That understanding makes space for the whole of a person. For the days that feel manageable and the ones that don’t.
You wrote this clearly, steadily, without turning away. You didn’t package anything up. You stayed with it. And that matters. I see what you’ve carried. I see what you’ve offered. Thank you for writing. Thank you for staying.
Jay
Thank you for reading my words and sharing that you’ve had similar experiences
A reader gave me permission to share their response anonymously:
I’m a suicide survivor.
It’s really important that loved-ones know that when somebody whom they suspect might be contemplating suicide is very suddenly remarkably better and brighter and relieved and excited, that is a huge red flag. In my own case this was how I felt and behaved when I made what I thought at the time was the best decision of my life - which was to end it, and in so doing remove myself and my family from agony and difficulty. Once I’d made that decision I couldn’t believe how much better, how hopeful, how euphoric I felt - everything felt perfect. And then I did 'what I did' that same day.
I was lucky. I survived, but recovery has been an incredibly long process.
Thanks, Laura. I have also found tapping to be very helpful and highly recommend this site https://www.thetappingsolution.com/ for those who want to learn more. It presents research showing how effective tapping is at relieving anxiety (among other things), demonstrates how to tap, and has a free app I use daily.
I chose to upgrade to the paid version because it has hundreds of tapping options on a wide range of issues, daily inspirational quotes and short audio messages, and much more.
I really appreciate you putting the 988 crisis number out to the public. Also, by you- yourself talking about your experiences of having suicidal thoughts, and obtaining a therapist, you have helped people understand that they too can reach out for help. And you very clearly said to people whom are having suicidal thoughts-Reach out sooner for help from 988, and/or a good therapist, rather than reach out later. later. I do completely understand that there is no miracle pill for suicidal thoughts, and no quick fix with a therapist for these painful feelings. I have found Tapping to help with anxiety, and depression in my own life..There are very painful experiences in life and people need support to make difficult changes.